Bird by Bird, Word by Word

I prefer to read slowly word by word.
This type of habit usually allows me to have a moment. During this moment, I apply myself into a plot, but not always, and it happens when I read a book, 'Bird by Bird.'

While reading this book, I'm so ashamed and I want to hide myself like a bride at the start of wedding 10 minutes before. The sudden thought was popped up from my head, especially when I read this part, "writing a novel is like driving a car night. You can see only as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way," from E. L. Doctorow.

I made the biggest mistake while taking a picture story of a victim of domestic violence during a last semester. First, I made a main story even before meeting with her. I forced her into my plot thinking about how I could make a better story within a due date. But, we both felt something uncomfortable feeling between us later on, and she didn't answer my call anymore.

Why do you want to take a picture?
This basic question I used to answer became the most difficult question I've ever had.
I forget the moment I used to catch because I want to make one well done image at one time.

Okay....
Start with shitty first drafts. That's all I need to do now.